After contacting a very good friend via telephone, I got a better perspective on things. She helped me to calm down, get my wits about me, and look at things differently. She has been there in the past during some of my hard-core panic attacks, most of them I was crying and felt I was losing my mind.
I'm still a little on the touchy side, but it could be worse. I called the Social Security Office and talked to them. The lady on the phone was very nice to me, and that helped alot. She just wanted to know my work history, why I had a hard time working, etc. I felt so much better after I called. It was alot better than dealing with the paperwork.
Things To Be Done
I still have lots of things to be done, but it's nice to know that I have a few out of the way. I am not as paranoid about them as I was originally. I talked with my roommate about the rent situation, and he's going to work out something for me. I am glad for that. So now it's time to see what I can sell off to make some money. I have a few items in mind - some old unused guitars, old recording gear and tapes... Those should fetch some decent money on Ebay. Don't worry, I'm not going to auction off my whole life, just the stuff that is redundant and I don't use anymore. However, my vintage stereo gear will remain forever! That's NOT going anywhere.
Out To Face The World
Well, it's time to go to therapy, and go face the rest of the world. I know that it will do me quite a bit of good to go to my sessions, and I always look forward to it. Last time I didn't say much, but this time I'm going to share more with the group. I have issues of feeling that I don't belong no matter where I go, but I will do my best nonetheless. There I am accepted unconditionally; for who I am. I am grateful for that. Wish me luck!