Yes, I know I'm late posting about the details of what went down at the wedding, but I truly did not have much to say for a few days. As a matter of fact, the last few postings were just something to keep me posting actively. Anyway, here's what the scenario consisted of:
The wedding itself lasted only an hour. It was a very brief Catholic ceremony - short and to the point. I think that many people were relieved that the bride and groom wanted it this way. I'm not religious by any mean, nor am I an atheist - however, I don't believe that you have to go through what seems endless rounds of prayer and song during a wedding ceremony. Besides this, your legs, knees, and feet get tired from having to get up and sit down repeatedly. Admittedly, I can NEVER stay awake during a sermon - they put me to sleep! I still don't know what to make of that yet. I guess I just get so bored...yawn...
The reception started 2 hours after the wedding ceremony ended. On the way there, that feeling of dread was in the pit of my stomach. I knew that one of my ex-girlfriends was going to be there at the very least. What I didn't know is that I would see someone from my past (from about 15 years ago,) that I wasn't expecting. Honestly, I could have done without seeing him too, as he betrayed my trust as a friend, through being a thief. I'm not sure whether to forgive him for what he did or not. It's not unspeakable, but he did betray my trust. Again, I ask...
What Would You Do?
Dealing with my ex-girlriend was easy - I didn't say a word to her. She was with her ex-husband (who she kept going back to, in spite of the fact that he abuses her, ) so I just imagined that they weren't even there. I thought about saying hello, but it wasn't neccessary. I made my rounds, talking to my friends that attended, and avoided strangers at all costs. It's very hard for me to make small talk with people that I don't know, or people that I haven't seen in a long time. As usual, I felt out of place and that I stuck out like a sore thumb in the reception hall. It's very strange when nearly all your friends are at the wedding party table, and you end up sitting at a table with folks that you don't even know. I decided to to to their table and socialize. I found comic relief at least, which helped to ease the tension I was feeling.
The wedding party was asked to enter the lobby for their pictures. I waited silently for everyone to come back. That few minutes felt like 30 minutes to me. Suddenly, I heard some very familiar music come across the PA system. It was WWE wrestler Kurt Angle's entrance theme! If you follow wrestling at all, you know that when Kurt enters with that music, everyone chants, "YOU SUCK....YOU SUCK....YOU SUCK..." to the beat of the music. This happened without fail, of course. The wedding party was chanting it as the bride and groom entered the hall. This was just the beginning of a very unorthodox evening, or at least the taste that I got!
Needless to say, as the drink flows, the party goes right there with it. I found myself comfortable enough to crack some jokes, which were actually pretty funny. Sometimes I have this ability to make others laugh - other times, the jokes are too "inside" for anyone to get. I should have written them down on a napkin or something. My old friend "G" was there, and his thing is to point out the fact that I am bald. I just retorted that I don't need to look like a caveman anymore, and that I was a member of The Elite. This got quite a few laughs, and made me feel really good! Everyone was dancing, and having a great time - some playing pranks on one another as they danced. I remember laughing hysterically many times. I haven't done that in a long, long time, and it felt great. It's true - laughter is one of the best medicines that you can use.
I mingled with some other friends for a little while longer. I glanced at my watch and noticed that it was nearly nine o'clock. This meant that I had to leave for the gig. Reluctantly, I grabbed my change of clothes, said my farewells, and headed up north. When I got to the gig, the guys were waiting for me - they had everything set up, ready to go. All I needed to do was a simple tune-up of my guitars, and I was on my way.
We didn't have much of a crowd at first - just the usual friends and family that would come out to see us. That consisted of about a dozen or so people in the beginning. The first set was pretty good - the only real trouble we had was tweaking the PA, since we didn't have a sound man. We did manage to get it dialed in, without too many attacks of ear-splitting feedback (always a plus!) I had sore fingers that were still recovering from a few weeks ago, but I managed to get past the pain, and to use them to their full capabilities. I guess eating fried chicken before a gig (ala Jaco Pastorius) does have an advantage! The other sets went pretty well too, aside from a few minor setbacks. These will always happen, and they aren' t worth mentioning. One of the waitresses (who I admittedly have a crush on,) sat down to watch us play when she wasn't doing her rounds. I always feel flattered when someone takes the time to watch us play. This fuels me even more, which turns up the intensity to yet another level. Pretty soon, I'm so 'jacked up' that I hate to come down from that stage!
All in all, another great gig. We kicked ass and took names. We managed to hold the crowd until the end. For any band, this a great accomplishment. It means that you do make an impact, and that people do listen to you. It's such a great feeling to have someone come up to you after you have played your heart out - to compliment the band and especially yourself. I guess I feed off of that quite a bit.
For those few hours, I feel that I am above average, and I'm not afraid to go "off the wall" doing things like dance while I play, jump around, play behind my back, or make these hilarious faces that I wouldn't ordinarily be caught making. It's a totally "carte blanche" moment for me, and I just do whatever I feel like doing. I see alot of "Jaco" in myself, but I'm not ready to do backflips off of my amp (Yet!)
It's funny - put a bass in my hand, and I'm not afraid of anything. Take it away, however, and I'm a totally different person. I dread saying this, but it is true - if I'm not playing my music, or doing something related to production or recording, I'm basically miserable. That doesn't mean that I'm miserable all the time - If I make myself go out for a walk, go visit family and friends, or socialize with the roomies, I do tend to feel better. By force of habit, I tend to self-isolate. I'm so used to being alone that I don't think about it, at least for a while. Keeping yourself company tends to be sickening after a while, because you know what's coming up next, and there is no variety. The lack of interaction is extremely boring, and the novelty wears off quite quickly. You need someone to bounce ideas off of, to support you in your endeavors, and to be there for you in times of need. It's also great to be there for them when they need you, no matter how insignificant or important the situation is.
I'll admit, I'm still learning how to give back to people, and to hear their side of the situation. I have yet to become comfortable enough to offer suggestions or advice based on my experiences. All in due time, this will come about. For now, it's all about learning the ropes in life - things that I didn't really learn much about while growing up.
Jaco - RIP, buddy. You're sorely missed.